Motherhood. The toughest hood of all. I’ve been a mother now for 8 years. It’s like one day, you give birth. Get handed this baby and sent on your way. Then in my case, you have another. And another. Then before you know it, your trying to juggle life with 3 children. Raya, my third and final baby, has slotted right into our family. I found it a lot more difficult going from one to two, than I did two to three. We already had a routine in place, so it was just adding another child to the feeding, clothing, bathing aspect of life.
It did change things though. Having 3 children creates a unique dynamic in a family. You’re outnumbered, you have more kids than hands and bedtime becomes a marathon.
Of course like any journey, motherhood has its ups and downs as well as highs and lows. It’s almost as if you can have all the company and support, but still feel very lonely. Especially when you’re running on empty, reheating the same cup of coffee 3 Times a day, using dry shampoo the entire week, all whilst having a tiny human attached to your hip.
There are days when I don’t want to parent. I don’t want to go and do the school runs. I don’t want to make dinner. And I don’t want to hear the word “mummy” 453 Times a day. And slowly over the years I’ve learned to realise that doesn’t make me a bad mum, that doesn’t mean I’m failing, it simply means I’m human and I have my limits just like everybody else. It means I need to take some time for myself to recharge my batteries.
But regardless of the “lows”, motherhood is also one of the most rewarding jobs in the world. The payment is pure love. I get days where I feel like I’ve failed. The days where I’ve let them watch too much television and given them mc Donald’s for dinner. But to my children I haven’t failed, and that’s the most important opinion of all.
I think the main point of this post is for others to realise that it’s ok to feel like this from time to time. And not to feel guilty for those feelings. You’re certainly not alone. I think we as mothers, need to listen to our bodies when it tells us to rest, instead of powering through to achieve some notion of perfection that doesn’t even exist. We’re all ‘winging’ it. And my children continue to teach me something new about life everyday. Motherhood is hard, and we should be allowed to say it’s hard without feeling as though we’re being judged. But I wouldn’t trade it for the world. My children are my biggest achievement in life. They aspire me to be the best version of myself that I can be. They are the reason I wake up in the morning and the reason I push through my hardest and darkest days. My house is full of love, life and happiness and my world is a much brighter place.